So blessed

Hey guys! Welcome back... TO SCHOOL.

End of the June holidays and time to mug for EOY already. I have set my

target. 1st in class for science and Dnt. I mean i hope my wish comes true. Hahaha.

So this post is going to be a really long and heartfelt post. It's about my mum.

Recently my mum has been diagnosed with Agitated depression. I went 

to IMH(Institute of mental health) with her for therapy and consultation. Through the few

days spent with her, I realized something. My mum is a great woman, she is so responsible, she tries her best to be the best mum ever, though sometimes she gets really unreasonable, I know it's the choices that I make that make her worry so much so she'd rather not agree to some of the choices I make. She tries her best to help me, yet I push her away. She tries her best to talk to me, yet I ignore her. She forgives me each and everytime for the mistakes I make. Although sometimes, she say really mean stuffs about me like"I don't want you as my daughter anymore, useless, stupid girl, etc.." I know she doesn't mean it. It's just those words that you would say in a fit of anger. I was a rebellious child. I knew what was going on, but I didn't try to improve the situation, but instead, it gets worse each and every time. Just last year, my mum had a heart attack, her hands were all numb and she collapsed on the floor. I didn't know what to do besides crying and shouting. She was sent to the hospital and received treatment. After the incident, unfortunately, I still continued to be rebellious. A few years back, she was diagnosed with Cervical cancer. It was a really hard time for her because she was in and out of the hospital oftenly. Eventually she went for operation and it was cured. And around 4 years ago, my mum had a womb problem and she had to eventually remove her womb. That for her was something really tough to accept because as a woman, without a womb, you would feel really different. (but she's all better now and that's really great!) Around 5 years ago, when I was in Primary 5, something really big and bad happened in the family. It changed my whole life, it changed my view of my dad. I didn't know him anymore. Until now, I find it hard to forgive whatever he did but at the same time, I feel really guilty for drifting so apart from him. Now, I try to make an effort and spend time with him, He's a great dad, contributed as much as my mum, makes effort to make me happy and I really love love love him alot and I know he changed but I still love him alot because he tries his very best to be the best dad in the world and I approve of that. Dad, You are the best dad in the world. Okay coming back to my mum, now, after I came back from church chalet and Radcon2013, and also attending the several consultants with the Psychologist, I realized I started to change so much. I started to pray for my mum and dad. I started to care so much for them. Now my mum, I believe, is really happy and I'm really blessed to have her as my mum. Mum, I know it's been a tough time on you. Mum, it's time for you to let go and Let God like how I did. I have to thank God for changing me and my mum and the next mission is to change my dad. I love you mum and dad. I'm sorry for being such a bad rebellious child. I know that many things happened these few years, Im really sorry for that and I hope mummy, you would forgive daddy. I will pray and I will have Faith. Mum and dad, I hope someday you will be reading this. I hope one day you would be able to let go and be happy with each other. I love you.