A trip to an orphanage

So it was the last day of Desaru and we went for community involvement programme and we went to like an orphanage in malaysia. I'm not gonna name the orphanage but i have posted it on twitter so you guys can check it out. So there's this girl called Lexuan, she beautiful and she's only 5. What shocked me is that she was a damn strong girl, and she's only 5. I didn't really prepare any gifts for the children there but i bought Famous Amos so i gave it to her but hear me out first. So i wrote a letter/card for her in English saying "Stay Strong no matter what comes in your way. Don't let small things affect you." and some other words and when i reached the orphanage, i gave it to her like 15 minutes later and when i said "im leaving after everything ends" and that immediately made her face change and she was holding the paper i gave her so damn tightly and then i told her to keep that to let her feel better if there's any challanges later on so she quickly ran up to her room with that determined face(idk y) then she hid the paper in her secret small box. After that we played and our choir presented to them 3 songs, White christmas, Let it snow and Jingle Bells. Then in return they performed a sad song, about their lives(?), etc, so i was like tearing thru out, then later they performed gangnam style. I WAS LIKE WTFWTFWTF, 3 YEARS OLD KNOWS HOW TO DANCE GANGNAM STYLE. My Lexuan was there crazily dancing on her own, hahahhaha. So after a while we needed to leave already but Le Xuan still doesnt knows we were leaving. Anw, in the orphanage, there were children my age, and i could literally feel the emptiness in their eyes. I'm sorry and i know this is a sensitive topic but i just... cant bear to even look at them, knowing how much they went through, knowing that they have been living with no parents all these while, i was just so heartbroken and i just couldn't do anything but started to tear up again. Knowing that Le xuan is gonna be adopted soon and going to her new home puts me at ease yet also worries me alot because she already got used to having so much friends in the orphanage and suddenly, that experience of leaving again... So i rushed back to the bus and got her the famous amos and also another card, i wrote it in chinese, saying "Bu yao ku. Bu yao shang xin. Bu yao fang qi dao di" and also some more private words... Surprisingly she could understand it. It was really the time to leave already and i told her i was leaving and not coming back and i gave her the two things. Her face changed again and her eyes became red. She almost cried but i hugged her and i told her not to cry, not to ever cry, not to be bullied by some other kids in future. She really did held in her tears and controlled not to cry. She came and hugged me and she hugged me so tightly, not wanting to let go. I had to leave, i was so heartbroken, i looked at her and showed her  the hand sign to smile. She faked a smile even though i knew she was gonna cry. I smiled at her and left. I didnt look back because i was crying so damn badly and i heard her calling my name. She's just a 5 years old kid, yet such a strong girl. I hope i get to see her again. I hope she really stays this strong, or even better, stronger. The kids at the orphanage went thru alot. People leaving them, having no one to talk to since young. Imagine no one was there for you all along, or you had no parents, you would not even be able to read this now, without your parents spending their money on you. Thus, this really made me learnt a valuable lesson, appreciation..